This is a dictionary for those who are like me and likes to make the citizens of Greece to laugh! Be polite and try your best, even if i "wrote" these chapters with a smile, i am serious about learning Greek! This is just "writing" and i am not trying to make fun of tourists, girls, Greeks or anyone else!

Lesson one: We start with the basics

Yes are “Nai” and sound like neee, No are Oxi and sounds like ochii, when you hear occhii, don’t say “bless you” because they said no and did not sneeze!

Kalimera means Good morning, use it until 14.00. Greek likes to have long mornings. After that you can start with Kalispera that means Good evening. They actually only use it after 18.00 so I figured out that i could use “Herete” between as a nice gesture. But I was the only one saying that in Crete so I guess it’s not very common. It is still a mystery to me what they say between 14-18.00 pm. What I do know is that when am tired or drunk and I want to sleep I say Kalinichta, which means good night.

Sometimes I say hello and other greetings to people I meet. I can say Gia sou that means something like hi there, the weird thing is that it also means goodbye? And hold your hat, it can also mean cheers? No wonder it’s a telling saying “its like Greek to me” Another word for goodbye is Ta lemme. That’s more of a promising good bye; or like a threat that they see you again! And if you saying goodbye to someone that scared the shit out of you, Adio Sas is very formal and polite way of ending things.

Now that we said hello to the other person, let’s try to ask how they are doing. Ti Kanis is very common among Greeks. It’s “how are you” but latterly it’s “what are you doing”
Yeah, I told you “it’s like Greek to me to”

Ti by it self means “what” so kannis must be “are you doing”
Remember that Gia sou means hello? Well “Gia” also means “to”. And the G letter sounds like a Y. Are you confused yet? No you are not? Good for you because i am lost already and i am the one trying to teach you this. And the word for ”Good” in Greek is ”Kala” So if someone ask ”Ti Kannis” just say ”Kala” because they don’t ask for, or want a medical report. Kalo means “Good” to but I really don’t know why, you are just fine using “Kala” They are smart and understand you anyway.

If you understand you say “Katalawenno” and if you don’t understand a shit (that happens a lot to me) you say ”Dhen Katalawenno” The person you are talking to says ”Katalawenneté” after trying to explain something. Say nai for yes because there are no way you going to understand them anyway. Or even better, don’t say anything at all, just smile and knob your head. Endaxi? The word Okay is about the same word in many languages. The y are spelt different but you always know when something its okay. In Greek you say “Endaxi” and that’s not very similar?

Now we are moving on, soon you are real fluent in Greek, well or real close to that anyway.

Next lesson comes to a computer near you soon…

Filia //Maja

If someone wants a date, you say “nai”. Never say ochi to dates. The word no doesn’t get you a lot of friends. So now you are having a date and to now where to go you simply say “Po” for where. Add a question mark after the “Po” so you sound really wondering.

Listen where careful to the answer, you might hear something that sound like “Iothos” fallowed by another name. Iothos means “the street” and it’s the name after that tells you witch street. Are they saying Illeoforos Amalias, you are in Athens and you meet them somewhere along that big Boulevard Amalias that goes as a big heart vein trough the city.

It’s good to know the time for the date so ask “Pote” also here you can add a question mark. The answer to pote can be “stis mia” and that’s not a female name. Its means one a clock and mia is ena witch means one. Somehow one is a feminine word and you say mia instead of ena. Still think it’s easy? Shall we do a little list from one to teen? Endaxi!

1 = ena (or mia)
2 = dio
3 = tria
4 = tesera
5 = pende
6 = eksi
7 = efta
8 = ohkto
9 = eneya
10 = deka

A funny thing is that beer is feminine?? And if you order a beer you say “mia bira” but if you want two its “dio biraz” Well its plurals and singulars and as I figured that out, so will you.

Well, you are on a date and you sitting in a nice Taverna somewhere in Greece. You are really hungry so you say,”Ta iffela nafaou” which means “i would like to eat”. Repeat after me “Ta iffela nafao kati”. That means I would like to eat something. Kati means something by the way. It’s a polite way of saying you want something. You can also just say “thello” for “I want” but don’t mix it with Se thello that means “I want you”. Or at least not so early on the date ;-)

If you are not that hungry maybe your date have the time to ask you “Ta fellátte nafate kati”

So if you are saying something that you want, its”ou” in the end and if someone ask you it ends with”te” That’s easy to remember nai?

But since you just arrived to the Taverna you just want a drink as starter you can say “oxi efsharisto, thello nafaou pio argha ala thello napjou kati tora. You just said “no thanks, I would like to eat later but I want a drink now”.

I could explain the words efsharisto, pio argha, ala and tora. But I won’t. I don’t want you to be better at Greek then I am.

See you soon in lesson three where things are getting more “sexy”